Comparison

• Brother: you're like Harriet Tubman
• Sister: really? I'm like Harriet Tubman?
• Brother: well.. you're more like her than not like her.

I tried to explain the difference in shoes

• Brother: I don't care about dynamic support, training shoes, running shoes, whatever. Give me a pair of shoes and I'm trained to go!
• Sister: Ain't nobody got time for facts!

• Me: Oh, I got juice too.
• Bro: You got 'Juice 2' the movie?

I asked my siblings what they were watching

• Bro: ok, so this guy is living with her..
• Sis: he's not living with her.
• Bro: my bad, so this guy is living AT her..
• Sis: ...

• Me: I saw it on SNL
• Sister: You're SNL!
• Me: No you're SNL!!
• Me: ...
• Me: So negatively... likeable.

I sold something so I could get my brother and sister tickets to see local natives. Neither of them know.

My sister is gonna have a happy heart attack haha

My brother's haircut

• Me: you look like an unemployed kid cudi
• Sister: kid cudi looks like an unemployed kid cudi
• Me: ...true that.

I love my fam

• Mom: my laminater broke today.
• Sis: oh no not your laminater
• Sis: ...
• Sis: that sounded sarcastic, but I'm sincerely concerned.

haha, my sibilings..

• brother: Aye, and why is there a big N on the refrigerator?
• sister: Cuz I run dis man!

Let the record show: it is 6:05 and I’m just getting home. Gotta sleep, wake up, then its off to my sisters second b-day gift.